Tuesday, November 16, 2010

The Truth Comes Out


I told Fish.


I didn't think I was going to do it that day. This was a couple weeks ago. I'd been at work. Working away as usual. Hating it. Ty, one of my co-workers had been hitting on me for awhile. I wasn't too surprised, he had the player look about him. But me being who I am, I looked for the good in him just like I do with everyone. I talked to him, I smiled, I looked away shyly. He was a super good sweet talker. Better than I thought he would be. He kept it up for a couple weeks before the day I told Fish about it. He kept giving me hugs, telling me I was adorable, pestering me about when we're finally going to hang out. Which I knew was going to be never. Then he asked me, "Would you ever sleep with me?"

Oh hell no.
Fuck that.

I wanted to punch him in his charming mother fucking face right then and there. He knew I had a boyfriend, I reminded him of it daily. I tried resisting his wooing for awhile but just gave in when it felt good. When he asked this question, however, I sniffed him out for what he truly was. An asshole. A user, an abuser, someone who viewed women as pleasure items. The kind of guy every woman should be wary of. I was angry. I was offended. I quit my job.

I was going to go watch the basketball game with Fish right after work. I was hoping that our team would win, that way he would be too distracted by the game so as not to notice my pissy mood. No such luck.

"Baby, what's wrong?"
"Nothing, I'm alright."
"You're lying to me."
"I'll tell you about it later."

And then we reached home and we went to his small bedroom and sat on the bed. Here goes. I should just out with the honest truth. You can't go wrong with honesty, right?

It took him a good hour to pry anything out of me. I was terrified to tell him. Fish has...a temper of some sorts. Sometimes I'm nervous that I'll accidentally get a fist in the face when it was meant for the wall. Or that I'll watch him hurt himself, bleeding on the floor from a bloody fist that hit the wall. I'm scared he'll move out of the house faster than I can blink, and go smash Ty's face in with a brick. Fish has a violent history. He could do it.

"Ty asked me today at work if I would sleep with him."
I saw anger leap into his eyes, and the anger burned my skin, set the room afire. I was even more scared.
"What did you say?"
"I said hell no."
"Promise?"
"Yes I really did."
"Have you flirted with him before?"
"Yes."
"More than once?"
"Yes."
"Like what would you say?"
"I don't want to talk anymore."
His frustration grew and he had to take a deep breath to try to calm himself.
"Look. I really need your help, if you can keep talking to me, it will help me from calling up every friend I have, staking out your work, and waiting til he leaves to beat the shit out of him and put him in a grave."
Drastic, right? Sure Ty is an asshole, but is he deserving of death or a brick to the head? In my personal opinion, no. He'll get what he deserves eventually.
His angry stare penetrated me.
"Who else is there?"
"Pretty much any guy that will give me the time of day, I flirt with."
"Are you serious, babe?!"
"Yes."
"Who." It wasn't a question. It was a demand for information.

This is where I really got terrified. If I told him about Jacob, who knows what would happen. I hate how Fish would talk about Jacob. Call him a 'piece of shit' and tell me that he's just another player that doesn't want anything but sex from me. He had me believe it too. Fish can be super convincing. Hell. Maybe that's all Jacob really wanted from me. But I highly doubt it.

I wasn't sure if I could work up the guts to tell him about Jacob.

2 comments:

  1. You are a very good writer. And the staggering truth of your words/thoughts is quite refreshing. Basically, I like your blog. Keep pouring your heart out, it's more than worth it.

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  2. I'd forgotten that you were a follower. Which makes me feel a little embarrassed now. Haha. Mainly because it's weird having anyone know so much about me.... I'm glad you like my blog though. :)

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