Another Fight

Ring. Ring.

Ring. Ring.

Me: "Hello?"

Fish: "Hi babe. What are you doing?"

Me: "Oh I'm just doing some writing on the computer. How's work?"

Fish: "It's alright. Just work. How's facebook?"

Me: "I'm not on facebook."

Fish: "Yes you are."

Me: "Uh...no, I'm really not."

Fish: "Did anyone stupid try to talk to you on facebook?"

Me: "Stop saying stuff like that."

Fish: "Babe, why are you getting all defensive, I was just teasing."

Me: "Okay cool. I'll just talk to you later."

Fish: "What? No, talk to me now."

Me: "No. I don't want to fucking talk. I WILL TALK TO YOU LATER."

click.



What the fuck? Really though? He hates facebook. He thinks that because of facebook I'll cheat on him. It's already happening right under his nose. It's not facebook's fault. It's MY fucking fault. I'm the one being a fucking stupid bitch.

I don't know what to do when Jacob tells me he loves me. Lately I have that nagging voice in the back of my head saying, "He's just saying that. He doesn't really love you. He probably tells five other girls the same thing."

I just don't know how to feel.
I don't know how to be myself.